I started off this post a few weeks ago ready to rail against the machine.
Awhile back, someone I hardly know took the time to share with me a thread that discussed me, my business and my friend in ways that were just well… shitty.
The nasty and ugly that purveys itself as the social norm irritates me to no end, especially when you see people you once respected had fallen down that rabbit hole of negativity.
When did it become so socially acceptable to cut people apart?
I didn’t give a shit what they had to say about me or even my business but they were tearing down a friend. Someone who jumped in when she knew I was drowning and helped me in a big big way. Someone I really respect and admire. Someone who didn’t deserve any of that.
I was ready to provide a sweet piece about my friend and how kick ass smart she is but then I realized, she doesn’t need that. Her friends know how generous she is with her time, the creativity that flows through her, and how big of a heart she has. She is one of the good eggs. Nuff said.
My daughter always points out Haters Gonna Hate. Let them. It’s a waste of energy & breath to care.
I would rather use this space to talk about the value of friendship & of the company of women I keep.
Over the past few weeks, I have had the good fortune of spending quality time with some really amazing friends. Adventures; Hi-jinx; Laughs abound- what they all had in common was that no matter what, I had a ton of fun and I know they all have my back.
Everyone needs a company of women. They aren’t just there when it’s sunny. They are there in the tough. They got you covered. Times of begging for a shoulder, an ear, a high-five, a cry, a giggle, a story, a Boo-ya or whatever your heart craves are sheltered by the power of these women in your world.
The strength of women together can be a most beautiful thing when the time is spent raising each other up vs tearing each other down.
And it was everything I needed.
I’m realized I am done with collecting friendships and instead want to take the time to deepen the friendships I have.
For those of you I was lucky enough to spend time with, thank you for feeding my soul.
You truly are my Company of Women.
I don’t have a lot of female friends and I never have. It’s partly because I’m actually a shy introvert and a loner and it’s hard for me to maintain friendships because I value and I NEED my time alone. But it’s also because women are mean. Ok, not all women but too many are. And I see it and I cringe and I don’t want to get sucked into it and I don’t know how to handle it and I don’t know what to say or do in the face of it. My most common reaction is to retreat. My other reaction is that sometimes the momentum of a group of women is contagious for me and I jump on the bandwagon. In either case, I’m ashamed and embarrassed. So, I don’t make many female friends in the first place and sometimes, I back away from the ones I do have because I’m just so afraid that I will allow them to make me into someone I’m not. I want to be uplifting, I want to support other women. I want to encourage them. I want to show them the love that sometimes the world doesn’t. And so instead, I struggle with being a friend to other women.
Oh yes..Women can be mean. 100% …but they can also be the truest support you have in life.
It’s natural and normal to get sucked into that harsh conversation. They say its 10X harder to be positive than it is to be negative. Human nature at its finest.
One step at a time. If the next time, someone is mean you either show kindness yourself or step in with a This is not right…whatever it is , you know in your heart what fits with who you are. Never be ashamed as tomorrow is a new day and an opportunity to show support, love, kindness is only a decision away.
This is truly a One Day at a Time but can lead to so much positive, its worth exploring every day.